Should I tell?

[Phoenix]

A new DNA match has popped up. Private tree. It took me less than a couple of hours to work out exactly how the match was related to me.

Had the person who managed the tree not provided the real name of the match, I could only have recognised them in general terms.

Do I

1. barge in breezily, and say I know who they are
2. suggest discretely that they might want to change the user name
3. leave well alone

[kiterunner]

I would go for 3.

[Ann from Sussex]

Originally Posted by kiterunner

I would go for 3.

Agreed. When in doubt....don't!

[Olde Crone]

I'm assuming it's a sensitive situation. If so, my rule is - only tell if asked a direct question. Even though it does feel uncomfortable to me, when I know something about them that they don't know.

OC

[Phoenix]

I'll let it pass. There are cousins on Ancestry who are more closely related. As the match is out there on Facebook, the private tree may well be to discourage messages.