Note to moderators: any details posted below are of deceased individuals.
I had originally started this post several months ago, just after the incident in question, but I lost track of time and eventually lost the draft I'd written, and so with that I'll give it another go -- with the benefit of hindsight, and the passing of the lady in question. I've never written anything like this before, so please bear with me and forgive any narrative gaps! Finally, the post has been split in two due to the character limit.
Part I
When I first joined this forum, one of the families I had been trying to connect the dots for were the
Hendrys of Ballymena (and later Glasgow), my maternal great-grandmother's side. Originally, all I had to work from was a sheet of A4 with some vague notes from about twenty years ago, and a single family photograph of people I neither recognized or knew anything about, and so at that time it was not possible to put any faces to names or put together any form of remotely accurate family tree. Also adding to the complications were that of my great-grandmother's siblings, several were born in Ireland, several in Scotland, and most seemed to use the surnames Henry, Hendry and Brown Hendry interchangeably. So, for a complete novice such as I, this made for an 'interesting' attempt at a family tree, as researching these names - very common in both countries - across several online resources is both tedious and potentially very expensive. However, thanks to some of you here (I won't embarrass anyone!) I got there in the end.
The reason I wanted to write this post is because of one of the people I managed to get in touch with, as it was not something I'd ever considered likely at the time and because that person passed away in December at the not unreasonable age of 94. Her name was Nan, and her mother, my great-grandmother's sister, died in childbirth with her. Initially, that was all I knew about her, and actually my notes had her name down as Annie (her mother's name), which led to a number of false leads!
I had initially wanted to search for Nan simply to see when she died - so I could have accurate information for my tree - and whether she'd had any children of her own; it simply never occurred to me that she may still be alive. I know you shouldn't, and I know that people can live to a ripe old age nowadays, but when I'm looking at relatives born in the 1920s my head just automatically registers as 'they're obviously dead'. I know, I'm terrible.
Again, being the novice I am, I was not then aware that Canadian BMD records are patchy, vary greatly between provinces, and are not exactly fantastic in terms of public availability. Also, as the Hendrys were traditionally Plymouth Brethren, Nan's details may well be excluded from the primarily Roman Catholic 'Drouin Collection' (something else I knew nothing about). So, I had no birth, no marriage, no death, no full name... I didn't even know her father's name, only - from my uncle's notes - that he was an engineer, and that Nan's mother died in childbirth in Montreal. That was it.
So, what then? Well, giving in to temptation, I scoured Ancestry's public trees for a match. I knew Nan's mother's name, and I had a vague idea what several of her mother's siblings were called, so I thought that would be enough to go by. Luckily, I did find a single match -- a chap researching Nan's father's second wife's family, which gave me his name, as well as Nan's (incorrect) full name and the name of her late husband. Using this information, I was then able to find a copy of Nan's parents' marriage certificate from ScotlandsPeople, which confirmed I had the right couple. And of course, having Nan's married name, I then Googled her, which led me first to a link to her husband's 2006 obituary, and secondly to an online birthday e-card, signed by various members of the Rosemount Bible Church in Montreal. I saw Nan's name on the obituary, I looked at the date on the e-card (2011?), and then I looked at the RBC's website -
'RBC is a Christian congregation of about 345 adults and children, associated with similar congregations under the name of Christian Brethren Churches in Quebec (CBCQ)...' - and I thought...
could she still be alive?
Well, it couldn't hurt to e-mail the RBC and ask, could it? So, I contacted a chap named Nick, one of the church elders, who informed me that yes, he knew Nan, and that he would forward my query to a woman named Laura, a long-time friend of Nan's who would be better able to help me. A few days later, Laura duly replied:
'Hello James
Your request for information about Nan Price has been forwarded to us.
Nan is 95 and living in a nursing home where she is well cared for. She is frail, doesn’t talk much, but is able to answer simple questions requiring short one or two word replies on good days.
Her parents were Annie Hendry and Robert Binning.
Nan was born in Montreal on March 20, 1921, and her mother died in childbirth. (Her father remarried and had 4 sons, none of whom are still living.)
She married Wylam Price on April 10, 1948. He died on Sept. 16, 2006.
They had no children.
I will see Nan on Oct. 26 and if you have any specific questions you would me to ask her I would be glad to do that and see if she remembers any information you might need.
Bye for now.
Laura'
I was absolutely amazed. Not only had I managed to trace this long-lost cousin of my grandmother's, but she was still alive and I was in a position to pass on information and questions to her. I wondered what - and who - she would be able to remember. She had seemingly outlived all of her younger half-brothers, and, as I later discovered, had not been in contact with anyone from her mother's family in over 80 years.
I began by replying to Laura's e-mail, attaching the very patchy family tree I had at that point, scans of the few photographs and travel records I had, and an explanation as to exactly who I was and how Nan and I were related. To her great credit, Laura printed off all of these documents and took them with her to show Nan on her next visit:
'Hi James
Sorry that I didn't get back to you sooner.
The day I saw Nan she was very tired. I showed her the family tree first and she was interested in it but didn't have any info to add to it. She said she remembered her Aunts and Uncles. Then while I was asking some questions about where she lived in Scotland she fell asleep.
After Nan's Mother died in childbirth in Montreal, her Dad sent her to Scotland to live with her Grandparents. When Nan was five, her Dad remarried and then he and his wife and baby boy went to Scotland about a year later and brought her back to live here with them. So Nan only lived in Scotland for about 6 years. She grew up in Montreal and married here.
Nan said she lived with her Mother's parents, not her Father's in Scotland. The address for her on the ship listing was in Glasgow. Do you know if it was the Hendry's who lived there or the Binning's?
I noticed from the ship records you sent she came back for a visit before returning to live here. When I asked Nan about that she said she came with her Aunt Margaret but on the ship listing it was a Binning travelling with her.
I am going to see her the beginning of December and will bring the papers and try again to ask her some questions then.
Will let you know how I make out.
Laura'
Fantastic, I thought. I wondered whether Nan had seen any of these photographs before, or whether she knew of all these relatives. From what Laura had told me, Nan had only met her mother's younger sister Margaret, and of course she never knew her mother at all. Her only relatives had been her father's family in Glasgow (as a small child) and later her step-mother and half-brothers in Montreal. As far as I know, Nan never returned to Scotland after her (second, I believe) trip to visit her grandparents in 1928.
Unfortunately, Laura's next visit did not go ahead...