In 1861 (so two years before she married mid-40's Theodore) Caroline Bodger was 15 (matches with her age in 1871 and 1881) and living with her parents.
https://www.ancestry.co.uk/interacti...cklabel=Return
They have a servant (out of employment) as a lodger named Anne Newman, born about 1837 in Cambridge. Could this be Sarah Ann (and if it is, what has she done with her children?) or perhaps a close relative?
EDIT - Anne isn't actually in the same household as the Bodgers, but through the same front door! Maybe Theodore was paying for her to live there and so met Caroline?