Joseph is with James and Ellen Holden in 1861, 71 and 1881. In each case his age fits with a birthday between Apr 1854 and Apr 1855. Then your Congregational Church record suggests between May 1854 and May 1855. 10 Aug 1854 fits all these!
I wasn't sure which entry was him after 1881? (and I don't know when he died, or if he married etc etc)
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 Merry
"Something has been filled in that I didn't know was blank" Matthew Broderick WDYTYA? March 2010
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